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So I made a Fat Elvis costume for my friend's kid.  It looked kind of awesome.  I am expecting a shipment of candy – my tithe, if you will.

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Oh. That. I can TOTALLY explain!

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I made a costume for a friend's son, Niko.  Since Niko is deliciously chubby like all adorable 2 year olds are, I decided that I will make him The Fat Elvis Costume. 

I got a white zip hoodie/pant set from Walmart, and played with it.  Got a whole pile of iron on rhinestone patterns, and went to fucking town, ya'll. 

 

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…And you know what they were selling right next to the foam tombstones and fake blood and slutty costumes and life sized mummies and vampire?
 
CHRISTMAS STUFF. Namely, a life sized, plastic, light-up Nativity set.  Yes, wiith the Jesus in the manger and Mary looking constipated and angels blowing trumpets and three (ethnically ambiguous) kings, and tranny camels and donkeys looking stoned and everything.
 
You know where I wanted to go. I know YOU know exactly what was going through my mind.
 
Why didn't I swap the life sized evil scarecrow and creepy mummy and animatronic vampire for the 3 kings and put some bats in the manger?  WHY?  Dammit all to hell, Walmart!  Why did I pick the night where there were actual employees doing actual employment type activities?
 
 
 
Also, HAI GUYS.  Long time, no write!

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3rd ink!

It's not done – I am going back to get the moon inked in white, and to fill in the crane.  Isn't it beautiful?

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Everyone knows that Northern Virginia is straight up gangsta.   A-town? Alexandria?  Yo, you're gonna need a flak jacket and a bulletproof Hummer to get around – getting to that new Whole Foods and Trader Joes is fucking MURDAH.  Those crazy bitches with their perfect blond hair, sweater over their shoulders and pearls around their necks will cut you.

So this is for my peeps up in A-Town. 

 

You know your hood is gangsta when there are starbucks every 5 feet.

 

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